1. If a child says it’s chicken, it’s chicken. Never, ever disagree with this.

2. If you catch the scent of a poopy diaper, tell your toddler to run to Daddy saying “I have a poopy!” Do not let your husband catch you doing this.

3. Kids know that money comes from walls.

4. Poop comes in strange colors sometimes. Think about what you’ve been feeding your kids before calling the doctor.

5. If it’s on a plate, kids will be picky about eating. Not so if it’s on the ground.

6. Take time for yourself. Grocery shopping without the kids counts less than a quarter of what real time for yourself is.

7. Lock the bathroom door if you want privacy.

8. Let your kids get dirty. Have the camera ready.

9. There’s no such thing as a perfect kid. Or a perfect parent. Meltdowns happen, whether in communication or screaming on the floor.

10. It’s okay for to be completely out of style. If your toddler can wear pink and yellow stripes with a green and brown floral print, how bad can you possibly look?

Well, yes, bad since what looks cute on a toddler is terrible for an adult, but at least you have an excuse.

11. It’s okay to look goofy while dancing.

12. Sometimes it’s fun to have meals out of order.

Who says breakfast foods are just for breakfast? My son likes pickles and/or tuna for breakfast. It may be a bit strong for me, but just perfect so far as he’s concerned.

13. Kisses make many things better.

14. Kids are unashamed about asking for what they want.

15. A favorite lost toy may be a crisis of international proportions. Or so it will feel as you search for it.

16. You will learn obscure facts about your children’s favorite shows.

17. Finishing off the food your child doesn’t somehow seems normal, even if you’d never accept anyone else’s leftovers.

18. Potty habits of your young children are an easy topic of conversation, especially with other parents of young children.

19. Some days the best part of the day is after you put the kids to bed. Other times it’s the loneliest part of the day.

20. News about children getting hurt can make you cry.